Bleeding Moons

I saw her dreaming.
Waiting for the moon to acknowledge her existence.
Saw where her tears left rails that glistened against the light,
she was trying to fight death…
Or maybe it was her life she was trying to win against,
trying to end it.
Tracing the names of those who hurt her into her skin
like her body was her diary,
and her favorite pen…
sliced through her pages easily.
Always writing horizontally.
She’s written some of the best poems in her skin,
but sadly…
I’ve heard them all before.
They sound a lot like the ones i wrote in my yesterdays,
her pen even follows the same strokes.
She’s right handed too…
but she has so much more to lose than i did,
and i wish she wouldn’t follow in my shoes.
They’re much too big for her.
She deserves so much more than my hand me down heartache,
and i want her life to be so much better than mine ever was…
But i guess that’s a little too optimistic,
though gifted with poetic tendencies
she doesn’t quite know how to handle her feelings.
And sometimes…
they overtake her.
And it hurts me to look at her.
It feels too much like putting a puzzle piece mirror back together,
and i don’t really like looking at myself too much.
It makes me face reality,
and it bites just a little too hard.
Leaving teeth marks across my wrists…
my scars never quite healed,
neither physical…
nor emotional.
They just got added to,
and extended.
I understand where she is coming from.
Understand how easily it looks to end it…
Understand how appealing sharp objects can be,
though deadly…
sometimes knives can look a lot like angel wings.
Ready and waiting to comfort
and make everything a lot easier.
But little girl,
you are not alone in this world…
despite how much you thought you were,
and despite how much you want to be.
I hear everything your face is trying to say to me.
But right now I need you to listen.
I’m trying to set an example
Be your sinfully simple savior slicing similes into this paper,
instead of into my skin.
If you’re gonna look up to me,
look up to the person who stands before you,
not the person that lays behind me.
I can’t even explain to you how much your suicidal tendencies are killing me.
I’ve already lost so many…
and now you want to leave me too?
Yeah, i saw you dreaming…
and I’m sorry i didn’t acknowledge your existence sooner.
But now,
I’ve adopted you as little sister
and now I’ll be damned if i let anyone hurt you,
even you…
or any reflection of me.
So hold on for me
fight death for me
cause though you are looking up to me
what you don’t know is I’m looking up to you too
and I’d hate to see my star fall…
but I’ll here to catch you if ever you decide to
i can help heal you
as long as you promise to do the same for me…
your moon…